This is a collaborative post.
The holiday season is supposed to be a wonderful time spent with family, sharing joy and showing appreciation to loved ones. No wonder Christmas is the favorite time of the year for many people. However, a divorce considerably complicates the situation. How can you be in a festive mood when you’re stressing about seeing your ex-partner. Still, you have to remember about your children, who deserve a proper holiday celebration.
To avoid a Christmas disaster, you should carefully plan with your ex-partner what to do. You might want to decide earlier with whom the child will spend particular days, and discuss the presents to avoid comparison. Communication is the key, and it may be hard, but you should remember that your child’s well-being is the most important factor. However, you should know that you aren’t alone, and there are ways to find help if needed.
You shouldn’t let the conflict between you and your ex-partner ruin your child’s holiday. In this article, you’ll find advice on how to plan for holidays when divorced.
Decide What Your Child Will Do on Holiday
Even if you’re going to see your child regularly, you should decide with your ex-partner what they will do during the holidays. You can also talk to the child beforehand and explain that they will spend certain days with each parent. You should remember that your child may not understand the situation fully, so be careful when explaining things.
However, it may be a bit difficult when your ex-partner doesn’t want to talk with you. If this is the case, you should try to get in touch with your kid or seek divorce advice from a professional. The holiday season is not the time for conflicts, and your child should be able to spend time with both of you even if you’re divorced.
Talk to Your Ex-partner Early
It’s better to discuss the plans for the entire holiday season early. This way, you’ll avoid last-minute discussions and will have time to discuss all the issues. If you’re both busy people working, this might be hard, but it’s still better to sort things out before Thanksgiving or Hanukkah than on Christmas Eve. Also, try to be as organized as possible and write down your plans. That way, you’ll avoid unnecessary discussions and keep things clear.
Discuss with your ex-partner how to handle the holidays and if you should create a specific schedule. It might be the best solution to decide who will get the child on which day and how to spend the day. However, you should remember that every family is different and will have its traditions and ways of celebrating. Also, be sure to discuss how to resolve situations such as a broken dish or a flat tire with your ex-partner. The holidays are supposed to be enjoyable, so don’t escalate the situation to the point where it might ruin your child’s holiday spirit.
Plan Gifts Together
One of the most common problems during this time of year is gift comparison. If you give your kid more expensive presents than your ex-partner, it may affect the child’s thinking and make them feel sad and confused. That’s why you should discuss gifts and try to avoid comparison.
Probably the best idea is to agree to give equal presents to your child so that they will feel special on both sides. If your ex-partner is wealthier than you, you can contribute more time to your child instead of gifts. However, if that’s not possible, you should agree on how much to spend on your child. It’s better to give something small but meaningful than one big present.
Don’t Forget About Your Child’s Opinion
Remember that every person has their own opinion about holidays and how to celebrate them. For example, you and your ex-partner might disagree about whether you should invite your partner’s new partner and their children over for dinner on Christmas Day. In such situations, ask for your child’s opinion about whether they want to meet their step-parents and siblings. If your child says no, then ask them to explain why. Let them know that it’s important to make everyone happy by including everyone in celebrations. This might help them feel more comfortable about meeting other people.
Final Word
The holiday season is a time when you should do your best to make your child feel loved and supported. A fight with your ex-partner can make things even harder for your child. You should be aware that changes come with divorce, and these changes will affect your relationship with your child. Still, you need to learn how to communicate better with your ex-partner so that your child would understand that you both love them and that there are no problems between you.
If you’re struggling with communication issues, you can find help from professionals who specialize in helping parents co-parent. They can give you advice on how to handle some situations, like discussing gifts or organizing holidays. If children are involved, it’s crucial to understand that there are ways to prevent conflicts, and you should use them if needed.
